Russell Brand: Once a “Junky”, Always a Twat

Dear Russell Brand,

Before you go getting all excited (I wouldn’t want you to soil your jocks), this is not a fan letter. Not so long ago, I didn’t have anything against you either. I mean, I wouldn’t have tripped you over if I’d seen you walking down the street. But these days I’m not so sure. If I saw you anywhere near me, not only would I seriously consider tripping you over, I might also take a photo and post it on your ‘rusty rockets’ twitter feed. That’s how I feel about you now, and I suspect I’m not alone. Because, Russ, it seems you are very happy to try to interfere in my life to make me as miserable as it seems you are. SO that’s why I’m writing this letter. To tell you we didn’t ask you to save us. Your quest for endless publicity and your misguided belief that you are somehow saving the “junkies of the world” is not wanted here.

So what do you have to say to that, russ? Who died and made your skanky, skinny jeans wearing self the spokesperson for all that is good and holy and drug related? Hmmm?

Now, I already know how you would reply to me telling you this. If you were to lower yourself to read the opinions of a lowly “junky” you would be thinking to yourself right now, ‘she doesn’t know what she needs. She’s too strung out on drugs’. You are thinking, ‘I’ve been to NA, and I’ve been the lowest of the low, but now I am saved. I know what you need, lady. You’re just caught up in the heady, beautiful maelstrom of drug addiction and you can’t see the wood for the trees, the needle in the haystack, the bliss in the bottle’.

Russ, mate, the thing is, I am compus mentus. I can see clearly now the rain has gone, and you are not the wind beneath my wings. Want to know what I think when I see you flouncing about making documentaries of your meteoric flatline along the path of abstinence? Want to know what I think when I see you watching your stoned self in your documentaries, talking about your drug use in your comedy shows and newspaper articles that for some reason keep getting published, talking about how jealous you are of the man you used to be when you were using, how you miss the old tinfoil every second of every day, how you were once, are now and always will be an “ADDICT”. First I think, ‘I would quite like to have a shot’. Second, Russ, if you miss it so darned much, if you think about it every second of every day and always will, I think to myself ‘well stop bloody going on about it and have some’. That’s what I think. I’ll help you score if you like. I’m sure there are many people who would be willing to get on for you if you would only stop freaking talking about how much you want to. Seriously, there are many things I don’t understand about the NA philosophy. One of them is, if it’s anonymous, why do its members make it so damned obvious they are trying to convert the rest of us to their chosen religion? But one of the main things I don’t understand is why, if you are all so miserable and can’t stop thinking about how much you loved using, why would you wish your misery on the rest of us?

Because that is what you are doing, and that is what I don’t like. If you were just making a bit of comedy out of your NA membership I wouldn’t mind. no one would take you seriously, would they? But it seems you are on a crusade and it’s not just a one man show anymore. You are getting support. You are being taken to UN meetings and Parliamentary enquiries and who knows what else to spout your ignorant personal views as if, just because you say you have ‘personal experience’, you are the expert on all of us.

I’ll tell you something else for free (though you are welcome to pay if you want). The reason you are being supported to attend all these drug related events is not because you have anything amazing and new and contentious to say. It’s because you are saying exactly what The Man wants to hear. You are so mainstream they should name a non-alcoholic sugary beverage after you. These people, the ones you basically are working for, have been trying to force us to be abstinent for years, even decades. And now they have you and all your NA mates, shouting from the rooftops that because you’ve tried it, we all should.

It’s dangerous. You are interfering in my life and you’ve never once asked me what I want. And me and the vast majority of people who have ever tried NA or abstinence and realised it was a long road to boredom are not buying it. so please, Russ, next time you think you have something to say about drugs, pull out the tinfoil you used to love so much, call your old dealer, and wait until you’ve sucked down the motherload before sharing your views with the world.

Sincerely, Elmo

Elmo on Drugs

 

2 Comments

  1. simonh

    What JC said, measured, mature comment. I have alot of respect for Russell, I think he speaks openly and honestly about his own experiences. To assume theres a one size fits all approach to a drug free life, or that a drug free life is wanted or necessary for all is naive with such a complicated issue such as drug use/addiction. Let people speak freely, analyze information free of judgement and collectively we might begin to create a environment in which people get the help they need, unnecessary suffering might be avoided and people are free to live their lives as they wish keeping harm to themselves and others to a minimum. I think its important that people can express themselves without feeling attacked by others being ‘for or against’ a particular position. Remembering that good implies bad just as hot implies cold should help in realizing that taking a strong ‘right’ opinion on anything will always leave you blinded somewhat. In that without those opposing you, you wouldn’t know how you felt about something to begin with.

  2. JesseC

    Russel isn’t an evil person and he has a lot of views that I agree with. I do not agree with his views on addiction and abstinence as the only option, but I don’t think that he is not entitled to voice his opinion just because I don’t agree with him.

    I wouldn’t call my mate a twat because he doesn’t agree with me on an area which is highly political, hugely influenced by propaganda and the enormous amount of money which maintains the status quo – both legally such as police, prisons and related industries and less than legally such as those I won’t mention but are happening all over the world.

    I don’t think calling people names if they hold a different opinion to me will help change anything. Just because Russel is a celebrity, it doesn’t give him any less rights to express his opinion than myself, yourself or anyone else. It’s not his fault that more people report or write about his views because he is a celebrity.

    I don’t think he is a twat, I do agree that his views on drugs and addiction are way too simplistic, but that doesn’t make him a twat. As with most people in the world, if we could educate him instead of ridiculing him, it may benefit both of us and the world could become a better place.

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